[Techlunch] FW: Loneliness, Isolation, and Isolators as a Cure for Loneliness

techlunch at happy.emu.id.au techlunch at happy.emu.id.au
Tue Apr 1 14:59:32 EST 2008

Something to contemplate next time you connect that D connector ! 


From: bbelec at bonded1.cooleremail.net
[mailto:bbelec at bonded1.cooleremail.net] On Behalf Of Mike Fahrion - B&B
Sent: Tuesday, 1 April 2008 2:26 PM
To: Mackay, Ben
Subject: Loneliness, Isolation, and Isolators as a Cure for Loneliness

Dear Friend & Subscriber:

After nearly 36 months of intensive research, the engineering staff at
B&B Electronics is proud to announce a brand new technology that will
enhance both the jobs and personal lives of engineers everywhere.

In 2005, B&B forged a secret relationship with Lirpa Labs in
Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania (which is also the home of Phil the
Goundhog), a privately funded institute that performs research on
Engineers' psychological and emotional problems.

Professor I. Lirpa, director of research at Lirpa Labs, told me in a
private conversation that the most serious problem that plagues
industrial control engineers is Loneliness and Isolation.  He says that
while their wives are the ones that complain loudest about it, it's the
engineers themselves who really feel it.  

"The loneliness and despair are almost overwhelming, and it causes them
to retreat into a private world of C Code programming, dark humor, and
morose afternoons listening to Depeche Mode albums on their iPods.

"The loneliness and dark humor are bad enough, but it's the shameless
indulgence in bad '80s music that really alerted us to the seriousness
of this problem," he says.

Looking at my own playlist, I instantly knew he was right.  But what got
my attention in my conversations with Professor Lirpa was his new
research into circuitry that modifies engineers' moods without the use
of drugs, psychotherapy or medical marijuana.  

Dr. Lirpa showed me a circuit design that forms a psychic connection
with the engineer who installs it, creating an emotional bond between
the system designer and the control circuit.

It takes advantage of the quantum effect that is generated by crystals
and has a powerful mood-lifting effect. In fact, it sometimes creates
halos around peoples' heads.

Most people know that lucky crystals worn around the neck can increase
golf scores (in fact this truth is proclaimed on a well-known popular
infomercial) but what is much less known is the fact that clock crystals
in electronic circuitry can have the same effect from afar, if designed

Which means you don't even have to wear them around your neck.  They'll
work just fine inside a piece of equipment as long as it's mounted on a
DIN rail.

This inspired me to investigate this further.  Dr. Lirpa helped me code
his proprietary formula into one of our RS-485 isolators and I tried it
on one of our engineers, Tony.

I did not tell him I was doing it, so it was a blind scientific
psychological test.

The very next morning, Tony (who is normally very morose) came walking
in the door snapping his fingers, listening to "Walking On Sunshine" by
Katrina and the Waves on his shiny new red iPod Shuffle.  "No more
Depeche Mode for Me!" he announced with a wide grin on his face.  

Then during lunch time I saw him talking to Patricia from purchasing and
making serious eye contact with her.  I knew he'd been admiring her from
afar but he'd been afraid to ask her out.  Suddenly I could see this
burst of confidence was forging new connections for him.

I was SO happy for Tony.

Right then and there, I decided, we HAVE to incorporate this feature
into our new DIN Rail Mounted converters and isolators. I couldn't help
but smile at the deep irony, that a product which isolates networks from
ground loops and the perils of Spring would also set engineers free from
their isolation from other people and the love they so desperately need.

I'm still trying to wrap my head around the possibilities. The thousands
of engineers whose lives will be immeasurably improved by the vibrations
that are put out into the universe by these new products....

We now have "Triple isolated" DIN serial converters/isolators for 232,
485, Fiber: 485DCRi,485OPDRi,232OPDRi, FOSTCDRi
1c1f5505d581/ben.mackay at actewagl.com.au>

and handy inline isolated serial converters, 4WSD9OTB, 4WSD25OTB.  
1c1f5505d581/ben.mackay at actewagl.com.au>

All of these units incorporate Dr. Lirpa's proprietary universal
vibrational, magnetic mood altering circuitry.  Including crystals that
have been shown in laboratory tests to improve your luck in golf games!

Isolated USB to serial - 1 port version perfect for field service 232,
422, 485.... And if you follow the instructions it will set you free,
once and for all, from your sardonic humor and dark outlook on life:
1c1f5505d581/ben.mackay at actewagl.com.au>

Isolated multiport USB to serial - Good-bye Depeche Mode, Hello Katrina
and the Waves!
1c1f5505d581/ben.mackay at actewagl.com.au>

DIN rail mount isolated USB to serial: Could this unit help you use the
Law of Attraction to find the love of your life?
1c1f5505d581/ben.mackay at actewagl.com.au>

And the classic Isolated PCI cards, 1-4 ports, 232/422/485.  Put these
in your industrial PC and feel your moods soar into blissful happiness
and a spirit of generosity to all the people in your life:
1c1f5505d581/ben.mackay at actewagl.com.au>

Oh, and by the way, as of today, April 1 the spring catalog is rolling
off the presses and will be going into the mail as soon as the ink
dries. Watch the mailroom vigilantly so as not to have yours stolen by
some lonely, isolated soul who has not yet discovered the B&B solution
to love and happiness and community.

Just in time for Spring, I'm celebrating the end of Loneliness and
Isolation - with more than 2000 volts of triple isolated protection!

Happy Connections,

Mike Fahrion
1c1f5505d581/ben.mackay at actewagl.com.au> support at bb-europe.com
+353 91 792444 

1c1f5505d581/ben.mackay at actewagl.com.au/tag=GC4U2321799170&sentby=ben.ma
ckay at actewagl.com.au>  

This email was delivered to you by Mike Fahrion - B&B Electronics.
1c1f5505d581/ben.mackay at actewagl.com.au/GC4U2321799170&ben.mackay at actewa
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your request. Postal address: Westlink Commercial Park, Oranmore, Co
Galway, Ireland. B&B Electronics Ltd Registered in Dublin, Registration
Number: 287246. Registered Office: 25/28 North Wall Quay, Dublin 1. 


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